Finding freedom in 2025 🌟
Choosing freedom over FOMO
They say there's something magical about birthdays - a moment when we can choose what we want the next chapter to hold. As I celebrate mine today (January 23rd), I'm choosing FREEDOM as my north star for this next revolution around the sun. Not just the kind of freedom we typically think about, but something deeper and more fundamental - freedom to live life on my own terms, freedom from trying to control every outcome, and most importantly, freedom to be fully present in the moments that matter.
This brings me to a quote from Henri Bergson that got my attention: "To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly."
Here's why this hits differently: Every January, we're bombarded with "new year, new me" messaging. I've been guilty of it too - treating January 1st like some magical transformation portal. But Bergson's words remind me that we're actually always in process, always changing, always becoming. The new year isn't a reset button - it's just one marker on a continuous journey of growth. This perspective feels so much more gentle, more honest, and paradoxically, more transformative than the pressure of total reinvention.
Twenty years in corporate America taught me a lot about change, but it's taken me even longer to understand that change isn't something that happens to us - it's literally what we are. Each experience, each challenge, each victory or setback isn't just changing us; it's creating us.
The second insight that's reshaping my approach comes in six simple words: "If it's not a hell yes, it's a no."
As a recovering people pleaser with a chronic case of professional FOMO, this one is hard. Really hard. My default setting has always been "yes" - yes to that extra project, yes to that advisory role, yes to that conference panel, yes to that speaking engagement... because what if I miss out? What if I disappoint someone? What if this opportunity never comes again?
The weight of all these automatic yeses accumulated over time, piling up like small debts, each one borrowing a little more energy from my future self. But here's what I'm learning: Every time we say yes from a place of should/guilt/fear, we're saying no to something else - often to the things and people that matter most, including ourselves.
Which brings me to what I'm discovering about freedom. It's not just about saying no - it's about creating space for a deeper yes. When I look closely at the moments I feel most free, they're found in small, conscious choices:
The freedom to leave my phone in another room during dinner with loved ones
The freedom to say "let me think about that and get back to you" instead of an immediate yes
The freedom to change my mind when new information or wisdom arrives
The freedom to choose presence over perfection
In the workplace, this pursuit of freedom takes on special significance. I'm learning that true professional freedom isn't about having no commitments - it's about being intentional with the commitments we make. It's about bringing our whole selves to work while maintaining healthy boundaries.
What I'm finding particularly fascinating is how freedom and control seem to have an inverse relationship. The more I try to control every outcome, the more trapped I feel. But when I practice letting go - of perfectionism, of others' reactions, of the need to be right - I find more space to breathe, to create, to connect authentically.
This shows up in my relationships too. As I practice giving myself the freedom to be authentically me, I naturally create space for others to do the same. There's such liberation in releasing the need to manage others' perceptions or to contort ourselves to fit someone else's expectations.
But let's talk about the practical side of this - how do we actually identify what's truly a "hell yes"? I'm learning to pay attention to physical cues: Does this opportunity energize me or deplete me? Do I feel expansive or contracted when I think about it? Does my gut say "this feels right" or am I talking myself into it?
Freedom requires space - space between stimulus and response, between request and decision, between impulse and action. In that space, we can check in with ourselves:
Does this align with my values and priorities?
Am I choosing this or reacting to it?
Will this choice create more freedom or less?
Is this a genuine yes or a fear-based yes?
The role of presence and mindfulness in all this cannot be overstated. Freedom exists in the present moment - not in regrets about the past or anxiety about the future. When I'm fully present, whether in a meeting, a conversation, or even just enjoying my morning coffee, that's when I feel most free. It's in these moments that I can actually hear my inner wisdom about what's truly a "hell yes."
So in 2025, I'm not trying to become a "new me." Instead, I'm working on:
Trusting that change is a natural part of existence
Giving myself permission to evolve at my own pace
Choosing presence over productivity when possible
Letting go of outcomes I can't control
Honoring my authentic no's as much as my authentic yes's
Finding freedom in small moments of conscious choice
This isn't about never helping others or only doing what feels immediately exciting. It's about being honest about our capacity, our priorities, and our own journey of growth. It's about recognizing that saying no to what doesn't deeply align creates space for what does - and there's profound freedom in that choice.
As you move into this year, I invite you to consider:
What does freedom mean in your daily life?
Where do you feel most free? What can you learn from those moments?
What would change if you required a genuine "hell yes" before committing?
What's one small step toward more freedom that you could take today
Remember, freedom isn't a destination - it's a practice. Each moment offers a new opportunity to choose it, to embody it, to create it. Each decision is a chance to align more closely with our authentic selves.
I'd love to hear your thoughts on this. What resonates? What challenges you?
Here's to a year of freedom, authentic growth, brave nos, and hell yeses.
With gratitude,
Jen
📚 What I am reading: "Hope for Cynics" by Dr. Jamil Zaki. His concept of 'hopeful skepticism' is exactly what we need - showing us how critical thinking + possibility can overcome the cynicism trap. Perfect timing as we think about systemic workplace transformation.
✨ What I am celebrating: Honored to be named the first US Brand Ambassador for the World Wellbeing Movement! Plus, don't miss their recently released Work Wellbeing Playbook - research shows organizations with strong wellbeing practices outperform by 20%. Download it free!
🎧 What I am talking about:
The WorkWell Podcast™ is BACK with Dr. Ayelet Fishbach on why making emotions our goals can backfire. It’s a must listen!
Raw, honest talk with Nahal Yousefian on the Unbuzzed Podcast about my journey through burnout and cancer and why well-being at work is more than just a buzzword.
I did a deep dive with Ashish Kothari of The Happiness Squad on building psychologically safe workplaces. Listen here.
🙏 How I am taking action: Supporting those affected by California wildfires. If you can help!
Global Empowerment Mission LA County Wildfires
Pasadena Humane Society (caring for hundreds of displaced pets)
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday, Jen.