Let's Stop Saying "I Had It Harder"

A leadership lesson from Gen Z

Photo by Simon Ray on Unsplash

Last week at the Semafor World of Work event, I found myself in a familiar conversation. As we discussed the changing expectations of the workforce and what defines a good job today, the inevitable question came up: "What about Gen Z?"

And then, almost as predictably, came the follow-up that I hear from well-meaning leaders: "Well, I had to struggle. The company didn't do those things for me, and I turned out okay."

Every time I hear this, I want to pause the conversation and ask: Since when did "turning out okay" become the standard we aspire to for the people we lead?

Moving beyond the struggle Olympics

Here's what I've learned: We need to move beyond comparing struggles across generations. Just because we endured challenging workplace conditions doesn't mean we should perpetuate them.

Real leadership looks like this: Making things better for those who come behind us. Not maintaining the status quo. Not making it worse. Leadership is about legacy—and legacy isn't about how much we suffered, but about how much we improved things for others.

When we say "I had it harder," we're unintentionally defending systems that may have failed us instead of building systems that serve everyone. The question isn't whose struggle was greater—it's how we can use our hard-won wisdom to create something better.

Understanding Gen Z's unique context

Rather than assuming any generation hasn't struggled, let's get curious about what shaped their perspectives. Gen Z has experienced challenges that are different from—not necessarily harder or easier than—what previous generations faced:

Most of us didn't have to learn active shooter drills in elementary school. Gen Z did. We learned tornado drills and fire safety. They grew up practicing how to hide from someone trying to kill them. The psychological impact of growing up with the constant awareness that schools—places that should feel safe—could become scenes of violence is something previous generations never had to navigate.

Most of us didn't go to high school and college during a global pandemic. Gen Z did. While many of us were building our careers in relatively stable times, they were learning to navigate uncertainty at a level previous generations never faced.

Most of us didn't inherit a climate crisis of this magnitude. They're entering the workforce knowing they'll spend their careers dealing with environmental challenges that will reshape everything from where people can live to how businesses operate.

Most of us didn't face the level of political polarization they're navigating. The degree of division and institutional distrust they're inheriting is unprecedented in modern [American] history.

They also grew up watching their parents' relationship with work. Many saw parents constantly checking work emails during family dinners, answering calls during school events, and struggling to find boundaries. They witnessed the stress this created in their homes. They also observed parents who gave decades of loyalty to companies, only to be laid off during economic downturns or endless restructures.

These experiences shaped their understanding of what work relationships could and should look like. According to Gallup's latest State of the Global Workplace report, global employee engagement declined to 21% in 2024, with managers experiencing the largest drop, and younger employees are particularly affected.

This isn't because they're "weak"—it's because they're honest about challenges that previous generations often navigated without the language or permission to discuss them openly.

What Gen Z is really asking for (and why it benefits everyone)

The data from Gallup's report reveals something important: "50% of the global workforce is actively or passively seeking a new job. Among workers under 35, that number rises to 58%." This isn't about entitlement—it's about people seeking workplaces where they can genuinely thrive.

And according to Lyra Health's comprehensive research on the five-generation workforce, Gen Z will account for more than a third of the global workforce over the next decade. Their influence will continue to grow. They're less tolerant of outdated systems, more likely to speak up about problems, and willing to leave situations that don't serve them well. In fact, 60% of Gen Z workers would switch jobs if their needs—especially around mental health—weren't prioritized.

But here's the crucial insight from Lyra's research: Gen Z isn't asking for special treatment. They're asking for workplaces that work—for everyone. They've helped normalize mental health conversations, amplified calls for inclusivity, and are now pushing us to redefine workplace wellbeing. This generation is "poised to redefine the foundation of workplace wellbeing—and they're arriving sooner than most companies are prepared for."

What they're seeking benefits all of us:

• Regenerative work environments that build people up instead of depleting them

• Fair compensation that reflects contributions and actually allows them to live—not just survive

• Agency and meaning in roles, not just tasks to complete

• Being treated as whole humans, not just resources to be optimized

As leaders, our mindset should be: "I can't promise you'll have this job forever, but I can help you become more valuable anywhere." That's not just managing a position—you are impacting people’s lives.

The meaning of work and why mattering makes all the difference

Here's something that often gets lost in generational conversations (and as Zach Mercurio so powerfully stated): “There's a critical difference between the meaning "of" work and the meaning "in" work. The meaning of work for someone may be to earn a paycheck. But the meaning *in* work is what they experience while they're there.”

Every generation wants meaning in their work. Whether you're a CEO or work in customer service, whether you're a Boomer or Gen Alpha—we all want to feel that what we do matters.

This isn't generational preference. This is human psychology.

The numbers in the Gallup report reveal a concerning gap: 65% of employees haven't received any form of recognition for good work in the last year. That's two-thirds of the workforce feeling like they don't matter—across all generations.

Mercurio's work on mattering explains this: "Mattering to others is a survival instinct, almost as important as food and shelter." His research shows that people have three essential needs: being noticed, being affirmed, and being needed.

"At work, we often subconsciously think people only deserve to be valued once they add value," he notes. "But once people believe themselves to be worthy and capable, they develop the confidence to add value."

This applies universally. As Tamara Myles and Wes Adams write in their research on meaningful work: "When we talk about meaningful work, we're talking about moments of meaning that can happen in every job, every day." Their research identifies that meaningful work emerges through three core elements: Community (the belief that you belong), Contribution (that your work matters to others), and Challenge (the ability to learn and grow).

Questions for All of Us to Consider

Instead of "Why should I give them what I didn't get?" we might ask:

• "How can we create conditions where everyone can do their best work?"

• "What would it look like if we designed our workplace to help all generations thrive?"

• "How can we use our collective experience—including our struggles—to build something better?"

• "What can we learn from each other about navigating work and life?"

The goal isn't to eliminate all challenges. Growth requires challenge. The goal is to eliminate unnecessary suffering caused by poor systems, unclear expectations, and approaches that treat people as disposable.

Moving forward together

Every generation has faced unique challenges and developed valuable insights. Gen X learned resilience through economic uncertainty. Millennials pioneered conversations about work-life balance. Boomers built the foundations many of us still benefit from today. Gen Z is pushing us to examine systems we've taken for granted.

Rather than defending our individual experiences, what if we got curious about each other's perspectives? What if we asked: "What did you learn from your challenges that could help all of us?" and "How can we combine our different strengths to create workplaces that truly work?"

The next time you hear yourself thinking "I had it harder," try reframing it: "I learned valuable lessons from my experiences. How can I use that knowledge, combined with what others have learned, to create something better for everyone?"

Because that's what leadership legacy looks like—not the preservation of old systems simply because they're familiar, but the wisdom to build on what worked while having the courage to change what didn't.

Let’s get curious,

Jen